Category Archives: LIFE

Lessons from a Musical!

Last Friday night, Rennie treated me to a night at the Elida High school’s presentation of Beauty & the Beast. These aren’t always his favorite things to do so it was a very neat treat for him to ask me out to “the theater”!

However there was another special thing about this one. Our former pastor’s wife was the director and Pastor Randy played Maurice, Belle’s father.

Pastor Randy, also known as  Maurice, inventor of wacky but useful things.
Pastor Randy, also known as Maurice, inventor of wacky but useful things. (Photo courtesy of Doug Boquist)

I loved everything about the evening.

The atmosphere was buzzing,

We sat near people we knew.

We watched children with excited expressions.

The set was so well done and costumes fantastic.

But of course, I loved the watching the story come to life!

One character after another made their first appearance on stage, adding their personality and flare to the dynamics. Continue reading Lessons from a Musical!

Words of Life or Death

The gift of a woman’s story is often what God uses to speak hope into the stories of others. My friend, Dr. Michelle Bengtson has told such a story.  It is my honor to share it with you today!

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Dr. Michelle Bengtson

We’ve all heard the childhood rhyme, “Sticks and stones may break by bones, but names will never hurt me.” I knew from a very young age that that was a lie. Even as I said them on the playground in response to a peer’s cruel taunts, I knew it wasn’t true.

Words hurt.

Scripture tells us that the tongue has the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21), but do we teach our children that? Or do we perpetuate ignorance by reciting simple rhymes?

Having worked in the field of psychology for over 20 years, it’s evident to me that children don’t realize the long-term significance of what they say.  They behave toward others in the very same way that’s been modeled to them.

As an adult who has been wounded by the words of others since early childhood, I probably err on the side of not saying enough—not wanting to draw any more attention to myself or risk further rejection.

Only three years old when I was stricken with an undiagnosable and life threatening illness, I was left to deal with the physical and emotional ramifications the rest of my life. Continue reading Words of Life or Death

Check the rear view mirror!

I was recently reminded of a little illustration I have used often. It goes something like this.

When you drive home today, you’ve got a big windshield on the front of your car. And you’ve got a little bitty rear view mirror. And the reason the windshield is so large and the rear view mirror is so small is because what’s happened in your past is not near as important as what’s in your future. –Joel Osteen

travelOk! There is much truth there.  It is important that we get a clear perspective of what is ahead and where we are going. With that in mind we can increase the momentum to reaching our destination.  If we spend so much time focusing on our past- we can literally come to a complete halt with any forward movement.

But ya’ll!  We have a rear view mirror for a reason! Continue reading Check the rear view mirror!

What do you do …?

Recently a new friend asked the common question, “What do you do for a living?”

I hesitated for a moment. Thoughts flashed through my head of the past couple of weeks.  Of conversations I’ve had with clients and friends.  I know what my job description is, but is it what I actually do?

I became a life coach because I got to help people, particularly women, identify where they are and where they want to go!  One of my favorite things to do is to partner with someone to create an action plan for their dream.

However, recently I’ve been more of a Psalm 77 coach than a life coach.  Have you never heard of a Psalm 77 coach?  Yeah, me neither. I just made it up!

Here’s why I use the title Psalm 77.

When I start working with a client, I often ask just two questions.

1) What do you want to talk about today?
2) What do you want to have to feel successful in this session?
If a client can answers those questions at the beginning of the session, we can make incredible progress.

However, what I find most often is before a woman can accomplish what she wants to be true of her, she has to grieve what isn’t!

Coaching (1)It sounds something like this! Continue reading What do you do …?

For 26 years…!

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Dear Brielle,

All day long I have thought of you! Since 7:28am this morning. It is almost unfathomable to realize it has been 26 years since the date of your birth!

This evening I just sat pondering your birth.

We lived in Honeybrook, PA. I remember waking up in the middle of the night, about 1:00am and by 3:00am we were making our way to the hospital. It don’t take long at all after that.  You couldn’t wait. There you were! 7:28am.

It was amazing! You were amazing! Continue reading For 26 years…!

Why do I do that?

Maybe I’m the only one (though I doubt it) that rubs shoulders with a mom, or leader or life coach that seems to really have it all together. Then I spend the next 48 hours comparing all the things I don’t like about myself to all the stuff that is great about her.

WHY DO I DO THAT?comparing you

 

 

I had that experience last week.  Knocked me right off my feet for a while-actually it messed up my comfort zone.  Suddenly I was discontent with everything about me- my business, my energy level, my opportunities, even my appearance.

Why? Why can I be blessed by another woman and her gifts and abilities and then struggle to find contentment with myself?”

Why does someone else's success threaten mine? Click To Tweet

Maybe it is because…. Continue reading Why do I do that?

Being YOU…bravely!

I stole that title from a MOPS group I spoke at in December.  It’s their theme for the year.  More and more, I’m finding it to be mine.

Ever since I started my business as a life coach, I have been on a journey of finding confidence in my new business.  I’ve done this professionally for 4 years now, and though I’ve gained a great deal of confidence in what I can offer a client, it doesn’t take much to cause me to question myself again.  Especially this past couple of weeks as I have met 4 or 5 life coaches in our area.

Yep!  There I went again!  “O who do I think I am to be able to compete or win the comparison with those amazing coaches!”

But we don’t just begin to doubt then.

We become weak kneed anytime we lose sight of our own beauty and begin to compare our weaknesses to the strengths of another. Click To Tweet

Continue reading Being YOU…bravely!

28 Years Ago Today…!

Dear Cait,

Twenty-eight years ago today, I was 28 years old. (yes, go ahead and do the math!)

You made me a mom for the 1st time.  Caitlin Renee Burrus bears the weight of names close to both your mom and dad,  Kathlyn and Rennie. I am sorry to do that to you!

You,  little girl, changed our world in ways we couldn’t imagine. Your Dad has often said he planned for how to feed you and dress you, provide a bed for you and a room of your very own in our small apartment. He planned for everything but how he would feel when you were born.  He saw your face, there was not doubt you were his.  The love he had for you was instant.

C & doll darker Continue reading 28 Years Ago Today…!

Tell us About Green Hope Coaching…

I recently had an interview regarding my business and the events for married couples called “CELEBRATE the DANCE”.  Thought I’d share it with you so you can understand why this invitation is so important.

Tell us about KATHY BURRUS, GREEN HOPE COACHING:

Kathy: I am a life and marriage coach that works primarily with women in some transition of life.  In the change that occurs with  their next step, I most often hear from them “I want to do something that matters.  I want to make a difference in my world.”  I help them identify what their core values are and what ‘difference’ is most important to them.  Then we determine how to go about it.

Often in that process is the influence/ or roadblocks they have in their marriage.  These women who want to make a difference usually desire to have a stronger marriage- even if their marriage is good.  It is my heart’s cry to see couples thriving together- not settling or complacent with things as is too often the case.

Green Hope Coaching exists to create safe and stimulating environments that allow women and their husbands to intentionally design hope for their life and their marriage.

WHY this is so important to you, Kathy? 

Kathy: That comes out of my own story.  Rennie & I have been married 35 years.  We KNOW the challenge couples face as we navigate the  choices and decisions within a marriage.  We’ve had times in our lives that we think we are going the same place, have the same vision.  Suddenly we end up in two different places and wonder how that happened. What we forget is that our expectation, preferences and assumptions often cause us to ‘think’ we’ve communicated clearly about where we are headed, but miss the mark by, what could be tiny differences of thought. 

Along with that are some seasons of life where one partner or the other is really struggling. For instance, after our daughter died, everything seemed too hard.  I wanted to care for my husband and family, but sometimes grief is paralyzing.  It was in that moment that Rennie stepped up in a new way for me.  He reached out for me and held on to me when I couldn’t hold on to him.  I hate to think where we might be if he had not. 

WHAT are some ways you speak to women/ couples and the issues they face?

Continue reading Tell us About Green Hope Coaching…

Who is carrying your team?

How many times in your marriage relationship have you asked a question that begins with “What if?”

She asks “What if I go to all this effort & he doesn’t notice?”

He asks, “What if I try & she rejects me and says it’s not good enough?”

So many things we decide not to do because of ‘What if?”

But what if we both get serious about this relationship and be willing to do the next hard thing.  We want so much for love to be easy, but it’s not.  It is hard to humble ourselves and give

Out of love

true love

God given love

That we committed to at some point in our life.

Too often somewhere along the line, one or both of us started living complacent.  We became willing to get by

Not addressing the issues

Letting things ride

But under the surface we are starting to feel something

A disappointment

Or an aggravation

Or an anger

That begins to boil

And creates an internal distance

Which eventually becomes a visible distance!

Then it becomes much more difficult to work through than if we faced it right away.

I know- I KNOW- it’s hard!
Ren & I have been married 35 years- WE KNOW!

But Continue reading Who is carrying your team?