I was sittting at the Arby’s across from the mall in the area that is all window. People watching at its best.  The sky was clear with the exception of a few, very small, very white clouds slowly drifting by.  What a beautiful day!

Every thing about this moment was life-giving. Even the woman in the booth next too me that was loudly complaining because her french fries didn’t come at the same time as her sandwich and she woudn’t be able to eat her food in a certain order didn’t bother me.

 

Today I got the proof copy of my manuscript.  Today I started the final process of putting together all the pieces that make THE BOOK.  This was a project I felt compelled to do 10 years ago, and now I was finally seeing the end.

 

Or maybe it’s not an end, but just a new view of the place that had once only appeared dark.  Today, the slivers of green had turned to blue sky and fluffy white clouds.  The time in the ground was now producing life and victory.

 

I took a deep breath.

maybe it's not an end, but just a new view of the place that had once only appeared dark. Click To Tweet

It’s been 10 years since we entered this grief tunnel.  So many days filled with tears and longing and ache.  So many nights that seemed to last forever.  Darkness that overwhelmed to the core of my being. Those were days when I couldn’t begin to imagine I would ever see a day like today.

 

Today I see my story for more than the pain that left me broken beyond repair.  Sure I still know the jagged edges of a wounded and broken heart, but it’s not the same.  Today I see God who brought healing beyond belief.  I borrowed some of those words from Matthew West’s song Mended. (matthewwest.co/mended).

 

I will never be mended in a way that makes my scars disappear.  But my scars and the holes that continue yet to heal are actually the thing that allows me to point to the LIVING ONE who brought hope.

 

The lyrics playing in the background finally caught my attention:

 

My Savior loves, my Savior lives, my Savior’s always there for me.

my God he was, my God he is, my God he’s always gonna be.

my scars and the holes that continue yet to heal are actually the thing that allows me to point to the LIVING ONE who brought hope. Click To Tweet

I almost giggled out loud.

Yes, He’s always been there- even when I couldn’t see him, Especially when i didn’t want to be near him.

My God he was as I lived through the pain.

my God he is as I work to write of all the places hope showed up in that pain.

my God he’s always gonna be; in my story, in the reader who reads my story, in the stories of the people who they touch.

 

Yes!  Today is an amazing day!

 

I’ve got a book to proof!

It won’t be long now.