So. Much. Pain.

I’m in the people business
Know people
Care for people
Feel for people

Because of this I have to be very aware of how I take in the emotions & pain of others. It can effect me not only emotionally, but physically as well.

Over the last few days a series of losses took my breathe away.

Death of a 26 year old friend of Leisha’s
Death of a 16 year old friend of a friend
Our friend’s 17 year old fighting for his life

Watching our parents process letting go of strength, while mourning each week the death of another friend or loved one.

Watching the girls navigate life and wondering what’s ahead for them and any future generations.

I’m not trying to take on all this pain but I’m struggling about what to do with my own emotions as I create a bigger picture for ministry I know I am part of
That involves more people
More stories
More pain.

Ah!
There it is!
The truth!

I fear feeling more.
Hurting more.

Then I reflected on the other messages
I’ve heard from God over the past few weeks. I’m sure you’ve had those times when the same recurring theme comes at you over and over again. Much of it culminates in these verses.

ISAIAH 61
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness,a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor. Isaiah 61:1-3 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah61:1-3&version=NIV

The songs we are preparing for the Ash Wednesday services are continuing to speak to this and affirming that same message– particularly this one.

Ashes
By Jason Ingram and Mia Fielder

You will make a way
Teach me now to trust
To lift my eyes again
When all I hold is dust

Chorus 1
From the ashes
From the ashes
You call my heart to life
Call my heart to life
From the silence
From the sadness
You call my heart to life
Call my heart to life

Verse 2
You will breathe again
Resurrect these bones
And all Your promises
I won’t forget
You won’t let me go

(Bridge)
And I have nothing but praise to give to offer
Nothing but praise to give
I have nothing but praise to lay at Your feet
Nothing but praise to give

(Ending)
From the ashes from the ashes
From the silence from the sadness
You call my heart to life
I have experienced God calling my heart to life. Thwre was a time I didn’t think it was possible, yet I have been resurrected.

I long to see other women know this power in their own journey;at least to invite them into a safe place to start the conversation about what God is doing in their stories, and how he wants to heal them and use them to influence their world.

Having to do this alone would be so impossible. But as I ponder this Isaiah passage, I’m comforted by the words “the Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me.”

He is the ONE at work and he has anointed me to proclaim the good news to the poor in spirit.

And I heard Pat H say just this week “this is something I want to be part of.”I’m already not alone.

I watch Beth B using her new book ‘Love Legacy Letter’ to inspire people to write their stories and share them with their loved ones.

I feel the support of Beth M & Bethany B in next steps and I can breathe.

Not to mention others he has placed in my life to love and support the work God is already doing, the ministry he is calling us too.

LORD,
help me see clearly the role I play
Maybe it is to have the vision
To build platforms for other people
To share
To care
To feel for the woman
Listening to their own story
And sharing
And caring out of that

I can do my part
I can see big pictures
And build platforms
And invite others in

LORD
Help me see clearly
Help me know who you are preparing to join in the journey
Help me see the team of people you have already designed
Help us love deeply
Engage effectively
Empower enthusiastically

So. Much. Pain.
To speak into
Together

We. Can. Do. That.

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