Category Archives: LIFE

LIFE, LOSS, Pay Attention

LIFE! or Life?

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Currently I am leading a study called PASSION PURSUIT with a group of women.  I have been glad that the group has been small and intimate.  The issues we have addressed have been transformational, not just for the others, but specifically for me. Often it has been in the community with these women that I have been changed-

  • Through their authentic sharing
  • Through the caring for one another’s deepest aches
  • Through the Holy Spirit illuminating our hearts and our longings

In one of the chapters, we have talked about the fact that God wants us to experience pure pleasure.

John 10:10 says

  • NIV: I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
  • NLT: My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.
  • MSG: I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.

But I have wrestled with John’s words a lot over the past 4 weeks.  I struggle to FEEL all of those other words that make me think of LIFE.

Several observations I have noted:

  • This does not just refer to eternal life- meaning what’s yet to come, thought that is a significant part of the LIFE described.
  • This means NOW-
  • Right now have LIFE
  • Right now experience a rich and satisfying life
  • Right now have a better life than you ever dreamed of.

What do you think of when you read about that kind of LIFE?

  • Energy
  • Breath
  • Vitality
  • Being
  • Freedom
  • Heart
  • Excitement
  • Get up and go
  • Joy


That kind of LIFE impacts

  • My spiritual health
  • My marriage
  • My relationship with my girls and their husbands
  • My business
  • My finances
  • My physical health
  • My relationships with friends and my community
  • My influence on my world

However, through a series our Pastor has led us through at church called the PATH Of DESCENT, I have uncovered questions I have found myself asking- or hearing others ask are:

  • Why would God- who wants us to have a rich and satisfying life, allow us to experience such pain such as losing a job, or dream, or a child?
  • How can you experience PURE pleasure when our hearts and minds are tainted with death and loss and abuse?
  • How do you experience PURE anything when you know yourself- and the choices you made that you intentionally acted on that were sinful, not to mention those times we slip into sin when we aren’t alert? 

How do we reckon some of those questions with what we read in God’s word?  How do we balance the path of descent with abundant life?

Now- I know all my theologically thinking friends (and husband) already have some terrific answers.  Thank you for being willing to correct my thinking- but don’t!  Not yet anyway!  You see these questions and the emotions that go with them are a huge part of the conversation that the Lord and I are having together.  From the conversations I have had with others, I know I’m not alone in the dialog. 

Those who are honest enough to ask the hard questions directly of our Heavenly Father who makes the promises in His word, need to hear His answers.  As we consider Holy Week, it seems like the perfect time to consider the journey to the grave and then resurrection.

I’m still listening for the answers!  I promise I’ll share mine with you. I’d love to hear yours too. But in the mean time, what are some of the questions you find yourself asking this Holy week?

Maybe identifying the questions will help us hear the answers with greater clarity.

I’d love to hear yours!

So…during this HOLY week, what have your thoughts, questions, comments been on LIFE! or life? (my last post)

I’ve had a kazillion thoughts this week- I won’t bore you with them here, but I’ve included a few in private post so I can remember some of them. For those who want to know more- click here to read.

For a list of scripture that speak of LIFE, click here to read.

GHC opportunities, Green Hope Coaching, LIFE, LOSS, LOVE

I want to know you!

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Dear Reader of this blog,

I have been writing to you for a while now, picturing in my mind what you look like and how your day might be going.  Writing to you as a fellow struggler as a wife, mom, woman of God, woman longing to make a difference in the world we live in.

While I know that we have a lot in common- I know that as a blogger, my conversation is very one sided.  I share with you what is going on in my life, ask you some questions about what is going on in yours and we’re often done talking!

But I know that you have much to say.  I also know that my blogs and my coaching would benefit greatly from hearing you.

So… I have a request.

Would you be willing to fill out a simple survey- to let me know more about the topics and discussions you would most like to have with someone you trust.  Your answers would be strictly confidential, but would help me significantly as I work to provide a service that would most help you- and other women like you.

Thank you so much!  Your contribution is making a difference in the life of another woman who is too insecure to have that conversation.

In appreciation for your authentic and honest responses, I would like to send you a Resource of Questions you can use to build deeper relationships with those you care about.  Sometimes a prompt helps get the conversation going in a direction that encourages authentic sharing.  These have been a help to me.  

LIFE
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Galatians 2:20

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

 

Philippians 1:21-22 For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.22But if I am to live on in the flesh, this will mean fruitful labor for me; and I do not know which to choose.…

Deuteronomy 4:40 If you obey all the decrees and commands I am giving you today, all will be well with you and your children. I am giving you these instructions so you will enjoy a long life in the land the Lord your God is giving you for all time.”

Deuteronomy 5:16 “Honor your father and mother, as the Lord your God commanded you. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Deuteronomy 6:2 and you and your children and grandchildren must fear the Lord your God as long as you live. If you obey all his decrees and commands, you will enjoy a long life.

Deuteronomy 11:9 If you obey, you will enjoy a long life in the land the Lord swore to give to your ancestors and to you, their descendants—a land flowing with milk and honey!   Deuteronomy 30:19 “Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! Deuteronomy 30:20 You can make this choice by loving the Lord your God, obeying him, and committing yourself firmly to him. This is the key to your life.   Psalm 16:11 You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.    Psalm 32:8 The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.    Psalm 39:4 “Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered— how fleeting my life is.   Psalm 42:8 But each day the Lord pours his unfailing love upon me, and through each night I sing his songs, praying to God who gives me life. Psalm 49:15 But as for me, God will redeem my life. He will snatch me from the power of the grave. Interlude Psalm 49:18 In this life they consider themselves fortunate and are applauded for their success. Psalm 56:13 For you have rescued me from death; you have kept my feet from slipping. So now I can walk in your presence, O God, in your life-giving light.   Psalm 63:3 Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise you!   Psalm 71:7 My life is an example to many, because you have been my strength and protection. Psalm 71:20 You have allowed me to suffer much hardship, but you will restore me to life again and lift me up from the depths of the earth. Psalm 73:12 Look at these wicked people— enjoying a life of ease while their riches multiply. Psalm 84:10 A single day in your courts is better than a thousand anywhere else! I would rather be a gatekeeper in the house of my God than live the good life in the homes of the wicked.   Psalm 90:12 Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom. Psalm 91:16 I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.” Psalm 101:2 I will be careful to live a blameless life— when will you come to help me? I will lead a life of integrity in my own home. Psalm 102:11 My life passes as swiftly as the evening shadows. I am withering away like grass.   Psalm 119:40 I long to obey your commandments! Renew my life with your goodness. Psalm 119:56 This is how I spend my life: obeying your commandments. Psalm 119:59 I pondered the direction of my life, and I turned to follow your laws. Psalm 119:88 In your unfailing love, spare my life; then I can continue to obey your laws.

Psalm 119:93 I will never forget your commandments, for by them you give me life.

Do your own word study on LIFE!  Go to http://www.biblegateway.com/

LIFE, Living Intentionally

Why ask WHY?

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For the past 3 months, I have taken part in my biggest challenge of the new year: writing my business plan for Green Hope Coaching. That was only intensified because it was part of the Ropp Triplett Business Plan Competition put on by the Bluffton Center for Entrepreneurs.  I am delighted to share that I placed 2nd in the competition.  First place went to my new son-in-law’s sister, Rachel Davis & Studio Silhouette.  So she’s nearly family.  I am thrilled.

INTENTIONALLY thinking through what GHC needed to be about became powerful.  (I wrote more about that on March 22-just-one-more-p-u-s-h )   I wrote a plan 3 years ago when I started GHC, but it did very little more than help me start dreaming. Valuable in and of itself to get me started, but that’s where it stopped.  But my new plan- only a beginning to laying a groundwork for the future of GHC- has already been a great help in the determining next steps.

why

 Part of the value was coming to terms with what I wanted GHC to be and do.  One of the questions that prompted deep soul searching was “What is your internal reason for starting your own business?” 

What is my WHY?

Of course, in part it is to generate income for my family.  But there is so much more WHY beyond that.

1.  My husband and I have spent 25 years of our married life in pastoral ministry. When we resigned from the pastorate in 2005, I began to research what I could do using my love for people and their stories as well as my desire to come alongside them during times of crisis and joy.

Through the Strengths Finder Inventory developed by Marcus Buckingham & Donald Clifton, I have identified my strengths as:

  •  MAXIMIZER: Focus on strengths as a way to stimulate personal and group excellence.
  • DEVELOPER: Recognize and cultivate the potential in others.
  • INDIVIDUALIZER: Intrigued by unique qualities of each person.
  • WOO: Love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them.
  • STRATEGIST: Create alternative ways to proceed.

I begin to research coaching and recognized WHY it was a good fit for who I am.

2.  Our family experienced several years of family counseling in an effort to restore our own ability to function well as a family.  At the end of our time in counseling- dealing with healing our past hurts, I sensed a need for additional help with our next steps.  I found some people who were very good at asking me the right questions to move me to the place I wanted to be.

I understood WHY I needed and benefited from coaching in my own life.

3.  In August of 2006, our youngest daughter, Leisha, was killed in a car/ pedestrian accident. In our journey to find hope in a very dark time, we were reminded often of her words not long before her death. I was teasing her that she was so anxious to get her driver’s permit because she wanted power.  She thoughtfully replied,  “Mom, I don’t need power.  I want to influence.  I want to say to people, I’m going, come with me! ”

I knew that I couldn’t be part of helping others if I stayed stuck in my own grief.  Part of my WHY is that I too wanted to say “I’m going, come with me!”

4.  As I’ve pondered her words over the past 8 years, I realized another reason those words struck a huge chord in my own heart was  because years before- when I was about her age,  I wrote very similar words in my own diary.  “Lord, I want to influence.   I want to go M.A.D- make a difference in the lives of people. “

I knew WHY I needed a platform- a place to speak my message- that allowed me to influence others to be intentional.

Kathy Burrus, Green Hope Coaching was founded 5 years later in 2011.

5. However, I sensed I was creating a lot of ‘activity’ but not having the level of transformation in my clients I had hoped to achieve.  I was also giving away more than I was taking in.   I spent most of my life as a pastor’s wife giving my ‘coaching’ away.  I knew I had to address the ceiling my own thought processes created and generate income with my skills.

In 2012, I chose to ‘close shop’ for the year as I helped both my daughters prepare for their weddings. During that year,

  • I observed the relationships of the soon to be newlyweds,
  • I recalled the dreams and expectations my husband and I had early in our marriage.
  • I watched and listened as our parents and our family and friends spoke of ‘the way it was’ and ‘how did we get here.’

As I listened, I began to narrow down what I want to be about.

  •  I know that my heart is deeply concerned for the today’s families, but most specifically for the marriages that head up those families. Hence, I knew the love aspect would focus on marriage.
  • I know that the aspect of loss will be part of the coaching I do, because it is such an integral part of my own story. Most often, clients do have to deal with the loss of something – dream, relationship, job, etc. before they are able to move forward in their story.
  • I know that life coaching is very broad – but it leaves the door open for the client to identify what specific area they want to work on. The primary topics here will be related to connecting with values, accomplishing a personal or professional goal, and identifying obstacles that are keeping goals from being reached.

 Working through this one question on my business plan, “WHAT is your WHY?”  helped me to understand the past 3 years of GHC were more about my journey to  be influenced to intentionally design hope for my life, love & loss, than about my business. I am in a new place now- personally and professionally. 

I am Kathy Burrus, Green Hope Coaching!  I exist to influence others to intentionally design hope in their life, love and loss.

What is your WHY?

In business? At home?  In your relationships?

If your answer is ‘money’ to any or all of these questions:  Ask WHY again. 

Why do you want to make money?

  • To get more stuff
  • To build a bigger house
  • To pay bills
  • To get out of debt
  • To help my kids in school
  • To take my family on a great vacation
  • To give more generously to my church and community
  • To live more freely
  • To ________

What is your WHY?

What does it tell you about you? About your priorities? About what you value most?

We would all benefit from the process of writing a ‘plan’ for our life?  But maybe we need to start with this one question.

 WHY do you exist?  God had a very special purpose that he planted deep within you.   What is your WHY? 

(By the way, I’m a life coach!  I get to help people answer questions just like that one.  Shoot me an email if partnering together would help you find your WHY?)

Fresh start, Intimacy, LIFE, LOVE, Relationship Issues

For you- we prayed!

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I was surprised how emotional the moment was for me!
I wish I had taken a picture, but I will not forget the image in my mind.

There we were- 9 women, heads bowed, hearts lifted in prayer as we came together into the presence of the ONE who invited us to Come to Him in the first place.
We are not praying for ourselves, though our words ring true for our own hearts.
We are praying for work to begin exponentially in the hearts of women we love, or don’t even know.
Women who live in our worlds and in our communities.
We are praying for women who have been hurt and abused,
who are confused,
who are curious,
who are loved, or don’t feel loved,
who long to be really known and deeply cherished.

It is for US- all of us as women- that we prayed.
It is for truth- God’s truth- about intimacy to be known and shared with all women.
It is for authentic intimacy- in our relationship with God, and with our loved ones that we prayed.

We prayed-
For you!

Maybe you didn’t know it was happening-
or see it happening
But you will feel it!
You will begin to notice God at work in you!
Because we are not done praying!
We are only getting started!
Just us – won’t you?

Leave us a comment below- let for us know how we can pray for you today?