Tag Archives: Celebrate the Dance

Tell us About Green Hope Coaching…

I recently had an interview regarding my business and the events for married couples called “CELEBRATE the DANCE”.  Thought I’d share it with you so you can understand why this invitation is so important.

Tell us about KATHY BURRUS, GREEN HOPE COACHING:

Kathy: I am a life and marriage coach that works primarily with women in some transition of life.  In the change that occurs with  their next step, I most often hear from them “I want to do something that matters.  I want to make a difference in my world.”  I help them identify what their core values are and what ‘difference’ is most important to them.  Then we determine how to go about it.

Often in that process is the influence/ or roadblocks they have in their marriage.  These women who want to make a difference usually desire to have a stronger marriage- even if their marriage is good.  It is my heart’s cry to see couples thriving together- not settling or complacent with things as is too often the case.

Green Hope Coaching exists to create safe and stimulating environments that allow women and their husbands to intentionally design hope for their life and their marriage.

WHY this is so important to you, Kathy? 

Kathy: That comes out of my own story.  Rennie & I have been married 35 years.  We KNOW the challenge couples face as we navigate the  choices and decisions within a marriage.  We’ve had times in our lives that we think we are going the same place, have the same vision.  Suddenly we end up in two different places and wonder how that happened. What we forget is that our expectation, preferences and assumptions often cause us to ‘think’ we’ve communicated clearly about where we are headed, but miss the mark by, what could be tiny differences of thought. 

Along with that are some seasons of life where one partner or the other is really struggling. For instance, after our daughter died, everything seemed too hard.  I wanted to care for my husband and family, but sometimes grief is paralyzing.  It was in that moment that Rennie stepped up in a new way for me.  He reached out for me and held on to me when I couldn’t hold on to him.  I hate to think where we might be if he had not. 

WHAT are some ways you speak to women/ couples and the issues they face?

Continue reading Tell us About Green Hope Coaching…

Who is carrying your team?

How many times in your marriage relationship have you asked a question that begins with “What if?”

She asks “What if I go to all this effort & he doesn’t notice?”

He asks, “What if I try & she rejects me and says it’s not good enough?”

So many things we decide not to do because of ‘What if?”

But what if we both get serious about this relationship and be willing to do the next hard thing.  We want so much for love to be easy, but it’s not.  It is hard to humble ourselves and give

Out of love

true love

God given love

That we committed to at some point in our life.

Too often somewhere along the line, one or both of us started living complacent.  We became willing to get by

Not addressing the issues

Letting things ride

But under the surface we are starting to feel something

A disappointment

Or an aggravation

Or an anger

That begins to boil

And creates an internal distance

Which eventually becomes a visible distance!

Then it becomes much more difficult to work through than if we faced it right away.

I know- I KNOW- it’s hard!
Ren & I have been married 35 years- WE KNOW!

But Continue reading Who is carrying your team?

I don’t dance, I’m a preacher’s kid!

Don’t laugh!  I recently had someone ask how I got from the kid who wouldn’t dance to a life coach that is using the CELEBRATE THE DANCE as one of her signature events.

Untitled design (2)don’t dance, I’m a preachers kid! That’s what I used to say as a young girl that got invited to parties.  I don’t dance!   My dad’s profession took the brunt of it regarding things I felt I shouldn’t do.

My dad’s a preacher, I don’t drink. My dad’s a preacher,  I don’t go to movies.

My dad’s a preacher… i only play Rook!

The only thing all of that had to do with my dad was that I was living out his standards for life.  But I really had not made them my own.

Honestly, I didn’t drink because I didn’t have a taste for it at all.  Still don’t! And I didn’t like what it did to my friends that had too much.

I did understand the importance of what movies I viewed- the whole ‘garbage in, garbage out’ philosophy made good sense to me.  That still applies. But I do love a good story.

The card thing- well, I never really got that- unless that it was involved with gambling of some sort.  But that’s never  been part of my game.

But dancing—that has been a lifelong processing for me.  Now I did get that as a young teen, dancing was a way for physical touch that might ‘lead to things’ as they often did when a fire was ignited before it’s time.  And there was often uncontrolled drinking associated with dancing!  So…I got that too!

The interesting thing to me is that I always felt like ‘dancing!’ It was part of so much of what I did! Even as a kid! I used my hands when I talked- a lot!  In some ways, that is like dance. Movement to express yourself. I heard music and my body felt the rhythm- not inappropriately- but wholy! To the very core of my being! and HOLY in worship!

I read the Bible and it talked about dancing- before the Lord!  Lifting my hands to him!  Praising him with my whole being!

What’s more- when I got married, my husband liked to dance! He honored my ‘I don’t dance!” even though he didn’t understand all my reasons.

Untitled design (3)But in recent years, I sensed a growing desire in me to dance! In my marriage, in worship, in my yard, as I clean, etc…my whole being praising the Lord, delighting in the closeness of my husband, celebrating life!

Eric Little, whose story is told in Chariots of Fire, once said, “When I run, I feel His pleasure!”

That how I feel!  When I dance- be it still quite moderately and unskilled- I feel God’s pleasure!  I feel my husband’s love!  I feel joy!  For a preacher’s kid who was more aware of the ‘judgement’ of God than His pleasure- this is a big step for me!

Why do we dance at CELEBRATE THE DANCE? Because it is an active way to be close, to experience the presence of our mate,  and to feel HIS pleasure!

Why don’t you dance?  or are you?  What’s the quality of your dance?  I can usually tell how our marriage is doing by how we ‘dance’ in it!

I challenge you to CELEBRATE YOUR DANCE with us – Sunday, June 8th at 3:00pm.  We’ll have a one hour dance lesson and then talk about what you learned about your marriage out on the dance floor! You will be surprised what you learn!

We have a few more spaces open yet for Sunday!  Let me, Kathy, know today that you would like to come.  Call or text me at 419-306-8311. Or email me at kathy@greenhopecoaching.com.

Need more information, feel free to call or click here to see the invitation.

I honestly  love saying to people, “See you at the dance!”

Dancing for the long haul!

R&K2  June 9 79

Thirty-five years ago, Ren and I started this dance.  We dated 5 years before that, but on June 9, 1979 we said “I do” to things we only thought we understood. We’ve spent everyday since then figuring out the steps.

We danced our way through Bible College & Seminary, trying to find a rhythm between jobs, classes, music recitals, and the studying that had to happen in between.

We excitedly danced through the birth of our first daughter Caitlin and a move to Pennsylvania where Ren had his first job as a pastor.

Then with joy we upped the tempo of the dance as Brielle & Leisha were born and then we made a move to Ohio.  The sign at the Ohio state line as we drove in said “The Heart of It All”.  In many ways it has been!

Over the years since then, Ren & I have learned:
the slow dance, square dance, line dance,
the jig, the bunny hop, the boogie woogie, the cha cha, the chicken
and even some break dancing.

Oh, you wouldn’t know it to see us on the dance floor, because they were not the actually dance moves.  Just ways we learned to deal with life and live together. Not bad for a preacher’s daughter that ‘didn’t dance’.

Rennie & Kathy dancingLast year, we danced again, this time at the wedding of both of our daughters.  What an amazing time to see them begin their own dances with terrific dance partners.  As we pondered the places and emotions of our dance, we imagined so much of what is ahead for them- the good, the really good, the not-so-much! Even the dances that might try to ‘break’ them.

There were times when one or the other of us wondered if our marriage could survive. Even if you have committed to stay married, sometimes the thought crosses your mind that it would be easier to not be married.  But I’m grateful to say when that happened, the other partner was willing to do what needed to be done to fight for it.

But what would have happened if we had not prepared ourselves for the tough times; if we had not built our vision for our relationship so we knew how we wanted to respond when we felt like throwing in the towel.

We’re going to see what we can learn on the dance floor at CELEBRATE THE DANCE, next Sunday, June 8th
at 3:00pm at Tanya’s School of Dance, Lima.

Some of what we are going to talk about is:

Why did you get married?

Why do you stay married?

What does a vision for your marriage look like?

How do you even do that with all the variable life throws at you?

What does looking ahead do for us if we are struggling in our dance?

These are some of the questions we will be discussing at CELEBRATE THE DANCE! Join us won’t you?  (Click here for more details.)

We’re celebrating 35 years!  We would love for you to join us. Bring your sweetheart and invest in the relationship of a lifetime!

Your great marriage starts with you!

Kathy & Rennie

Celebrate the Dance!

Several years ago, our family (Ren & I, along with our girls) joined two other families for a ballroom dance class. There were just enough boys for the amount of girls we had.  As we “attempted’ to dance, I was struck by the story each pair of dancers conveyed. We had the young partners who were just discovering the joys of being in the presence of the opposite sex.  To even hold the hand of their partner was fun.  Every fiber in their being was paying attention to what was happening- or what needed to happen to make this dance work. We had the parents- all of us married different lengths of time,    focusing on learning the moves, but also struggling with communicating on the dance floor.  It was enjoyable, but usually one partner was trying harder than the other.  One partner was getting the steps more easily than the other.  It made for jerky and awkward movement around the dance floor. I began to see in our own dance how Ren and I were dealing with issues on the dance floor that were similar to our marriage relationship. Ren was working so hard to do it right- I just wanted to have fun! The difference in philosophy definitely affects the grace- or ungrace- with which you ‘float romantically around the room.” HA! I whispered in Rennie’s ear, “This would be great premarital counseling for couples.”   He just laughed and said, “left, quick, quick, right, quick, quick”. So much for that!!! But when Green Hope Coaching began, and I saw the need couples had for some easier ways to have the harder discussions, I realized that GHC could build a platform for couples on the dance floor.  Oh, I never intend for it to be a show place or a reality TV show.  But a space for couples to enjoy each other’s presence while identifying what works for them- and what doesn’t – on and off the dance floor. Our signature event, CELEBRATE THE DANCE was introduced. DANCE TITLE Several times a year, Rennie & I partner with Tanya & Doug Shafner of Tanya’s School of Dance in Lima and invite area couples to join us for one hour of ballroom dance lessons with one hour of group/ couple conversation about what we learned about our marriage dance. Here are some of the comments we have heard: “How did you know what questions to ask?  I didn’t think my husband was capable of saying something like that to me- or about me?  Thank you!  It was so special to me to hear him say those words. ” “I never knew how much I was fighting against my spouse. Neither of us see any progress that way.  If we worked together, we both got where we wanted to be and enjoyed the process.”Who would have thought having the hard conversation could be so much fun!  I was dreading this- but it was really enjoyable.” One husband said, “I only came because I knew my wife would love this.  But I’ll have to admit, the benefit of honoring her in this was worth it all the way around.” So… Here’s your invitation to the Dance! CELEBRATE YOUR DANCE! June 8th, 2014 at 3:00pm at Tanya’s School of Dance, Lima, Ohio To register, click the link. Make a date with your sweetheart and join Ren and I for a enjoyable afternoon with other couples who want to grown their marriages also. Guys, Doug Schafner of Tanya’s School of Dance said to tell you, “If you can learn a football play, you can learn to dance. Besides, if your lady loves it- you will too!” How about it?  Celebrate the Dance is all about helping each of us Become One- on and off the dance floor!