Category Archives: worry

Defining STUCK

make a difference
This morning I looked up the definition of STUCK.

It is an adjective, a word that describes.

The Cambridge dictionary defines STUCK as :
unable to move from a particular position or place,
or unable to change a situation:

Examples of this are:
This door seems to be stuck.
I hate being stuck at a desk all day.
Ty got stuck with doing the laundry.
Hmm?
As I look back over the words we used to describe STUCK in the last post,  (you can read it here), I think that definition works.  We do tend to feel like we are unable to move from a particular position or place when we are consumed with fear, worry, anger, and perfectionism.  Or when we are confused and lack purpose or direction.
Many times we feel,  and sometimes, are unable to change a situation when we deal with rejection, or financial fears, or relationship issues.
Even in the wake of the current events in our world we feel  STUCK; uncertain of what to do that will make any difference at all in the chaos.
Add to that the myriad of messages that are part of our stuck place:
  • I’m not good enough.
  • You never finish anything
  • Who do you think you are?
  • I can’t do it as well as _(fill in the name)__so why bother!
  • Who would listen to me anyway?

Whew! We can get pretty deep in STUCK without even trying.

The problem is that when we get stuck and don’t know what to do, we often do nothing.
We are afraid that if we try to talk with our friend who rejected us, it will only make the situation worse, so we do nothing.
The financial situation we are in is so big and we can’t see what else we can do, so we keep doing the same stuff that got us here in the first place, or we do nothing at all.
We know we are not as good at something our competitors does so we throw up our hands and do nothing.
Fear is paralyzing!
Worry is exhausting!
Even boredom is draining!
The outcome of STUCK can be more STUCK!
OR
STUCK can be the motivation we need to spur us on to make a change.
So what kind of STUCK are you?
STUCK STUCK?
or STUCK MOTIVATED for CHANGE?
Leave a comment below- not for us, but for you to be honest with yourself about where you are.  That’s where we have to start.
Looking forward to hearing from you!
P.S.  How do I know so much about STUCK?  Well, let me tell you how… in the next post.  See you then.
P.S.S. Don’t forget to declare:
STUCK STUCK?
or STUCK MOTIVATED FOR CHANGE

Coaching on Stuck

FROM STUCK TO MADI had a delightful Saturday morning with an inspiring group of women at the Grace Church, Perrysburg, OH for their REFRESH & RENEW Conference recently. Wanted to share with you some of what we talked about at that event.

We spent our time together refreshing our viewpoints about ourselves, our story and our view of God.  We renewed our vision about the kind of difference we wanted to make in our lifetime. But we started with some honest talk about the ‘real’ of life.

As a life coach and former pastor’s wife, I’ve talked with a lot of women over the years.  There have been two reoccurring themes that continue to come out in those conversations.

  1. I want to make a difference with my life.
  2. I’m stuck.

Does that sound familiar to your story? You want to make a difference.  You want to influence your world for good through your life in your lifetime.

But you are stuck!  Or you have been!  If you aren’t stuck, or haven’t been, you will be so we might as well talk about it. You know what stuck feels like. Stuck has kept you from making the difference you long to make.   So before we talk about the kind of difference we want to make let’s talk about the obstacles to it. Continue reading Coaching on Stuck

Doin’ Somethin’ About Worry!

Yesterday I shared a Part 1 post called What? Me? Worry?  You can find it here.
This post is Part 2: the continuation of that post. 

My last post, WHAT? ME? WORRY?  focused on our need to acknowledge worry?  What are the concerns that are holding us back and why?  I identified some of my own issues with my current book project.  I also clarified which things I can do something about and which ones I need to let go of.

Coaching as I goBut It’s impossible to forget something, so I must ADDRESS the worry, by REPLACING IT.

I  have to replaced my worries.

In my case, I reconnected with my vision for the book.  Leisha started it. She handed it off to me.  I must finish it because she is not here.  Her story is the continuation of a legacy she left to me- and to those who will read it.

In my heart, I can’t NOT do it.  It is one way her life continues to influence others.

But, as a coach, I really appreciated that Mr Matthews provided some questions to replace worry; questions that point my worry to a new way of thinking, such as:

  • Who is the one person that might be influenced by this book?
  • What does success look like for this project? In a year? In a month? in 2 weeks?
  • What can I control?
  • Can I influence it?
  • Or do I need to let it go?

Taking those previous steps are all helpful, but have little results without Step 3:  Do something intentional.  I’m afraid that is where I get hung up all too often.  I’m great at pondering about something- but struggle to DO something about it.

So…I’m doing somethin’ about worry!

  1. I wrote to my LOVELY TRACES prayer team and asked for their support.
  2. I’m joined this Self-Publishing Summit and I’m learning from others who have been there.
  3. I’m blogging to you- to not only share what I’m doing, but what I’m learning in the process.
  4. I’m writing a little every day.  I may not be able to spend the day- but I can spend a few minutes developing a thought or researching a concept.

So…how about you? What are you worrying about?

  • Acknowledge your worry
  • Address and Replace the worry
  • Do something intentionally

As the call was ending, Chandler asked Mitch for one parting thought.  He said,

Take what is worrying you and acknowledge that could be the genesis of what you need to be coaching on. Very often the battles we face are the very lessons we teach on to reach the people were put on the planet to help.”

Well, I’ve had a battle!  I’m learning some lessons!  I’m sharing it with you, someone who may also be a worrier.

Do you need some help in your process?  Email me!  I’m a COACH!

I would love to help you intentionally design hope for your dreams!

Kathy
Green Hope Coaching with KATHY BURRUS

Also referenced Mitch Matthews from  www.MitchMatthews.com
and Chandler Bolt at http://selfpublishingsuccesssummit.com

What? Me? Worry?

If you are a regular follower of www.greenhopecoaching.com, you may have noticed that there was a great deal of time that lapsed between my blog on April 28th- and my post last week.

Considering the fact that I am a blogger, that space of time concerned me.  You see, it wasn’t just the blog, but I wasn’t writing original content for much of anything, including the book that I told everyone about in my April 28th post.

I must admit I was overwhelmed by the response to that post on my website and Facebook.

  • Nearly 13,000- yes, that many 0’s- were reached with that post thanks to several of you who shared the post to your own Facebook friends.
  • 1,200 of those friends visited my website and actually read the blog post.
  • Over 350 of them engaged with me some way; leaving a message, a prayer response, a memory, a picture.
  • plus there were almost 75 others who signed up to support me and the project with prayer.

I have been overflowing with gratitude.  While overwhelmed is not quite the right word, I do have a confession.  As the responses started coming in, I found myself writing less and less on the book.  Honestly, in the last 8 weeks, I have not written much at all.

What- Me-Worry-As I have pondered my action- or lack of it, I realize that I was worrying!

I just listened in to an interview with Mitch Matthews of Dream, Think, Do over at the Self-Publishing Summit going on with Chandler Bolt.

Mitch talked about how worry keeps us from focusing.  Worry strangles the ability to see ahead or to think through options.

I felt the weight of expectations that others might have on me – on this book- and I just stopped writing. I felt paralyzed almost.  The more I tried to get in the right frame of mind, the more stress I felt.  And if you know me- stress puts me down faster than anything.  I spent much of early spring sleeping.  Some of you know what I mean.

But Mitch gave a great outline of how to overcome worry.  I was grateful to realize that I had been taking some of those steps without naming them.  But I did want to share them.

3 Steps to PUNCHING Worry in the face

Step 1: Acknowledge it

Step 2: Address it by Replacing it

Step 3: Do Something Intentional

I had to ACKNOWLEDGE my worry finally.

  • What am I concerned about?
  • What if I’m not a good enough writer?
  • What if I can’t tell my deeply personal stories of my life in a way that helps anyone?
  • How will the book be received by others?
  • Can I really pull off the cost- both money, time, etc.

They are real, tangible things to be concerned about. But Mitch reminded us that most issues can be dealt with and overcome with a little training.  Or with knowing the right people to make it happen.

Yet, most people get so caught up in the fear, they don’t acknowledge the fear and overcome it.

There is good and bad worry!

Good worry- keeps you out of dark alleys!  It flips the light on so you can see what ‘s out there!

Maybe the thing that causes you to worry is something you need to give attention.  Sometimes worry is a precursor to identifying something that will help you do great.

For instance, look at my worries above

  • I can take classes and workshops to become a better writer.
  • I can work with close friends and coaches to help me tell my story in a way that is full of hope for others.
  • I can break down tasks of writing or research into smaller chunks of time.  If I do a little everyday, it won’t be so overwhelming and yet I can make a great deal of progress in the long run.

Bad worry hold you back like mine was doing for me. There are things that you can do nothing about .  That is the worry you must let go of.

So using the worry I have above about how others will receive the book, I have no control over that.  I know there is interest from the responses to the April 28 post I shared earlier.  But I can’t control how those same people my respond to the book.   So I need to let it go.

But  how….!

TO BE CONTINUED>>> Click Here! 

Part 2: Doin’ Something about Worry!