Because it’s a very special day!
(I apologize for the freeze frames in this video- but you get the idea!)
Recently a woman I worked with spoke these words,
I never made it home.
Instantly I saw a split in the meaning of the words.
On the one hand she was saying she had never made the place she lived feel like home. Instead she had resented this house since life had fallen apart and she had been forced to settle there.
But the words resonated loudly for me with another, more poignant meaning.
I never made it home.
I’ve pondered that phrase often since the day we spoke.
How many times have women that I have met with uttered phrases very similar to that?
I never made it home. Continue reading Where Do You Live?
This morning I looked up the definition of STUCK.
It is an adjective, a word that describes.
The Cambridge dictionary defines STUCK as :
unable to move from a particular position or place,
or unable to change a situation:
This door seems to be stuck.
- I’m not good enough.
- You never finish anything
- Who do you think you are?
- I can’t do it as well as _(fill in the name)__so why bother!
- Who would listen to me anyway?
Whew! We can get pretty deep in STUCK without even trying.
I had a delightful Saturday morning with an inspiring group of women at the Grace Church, Perrysburg, OH for their REFRESH & RENEW Conference recently. Wanted to share with you some of what we talked about at that event.
We spent our time together refreshing our viewpoints about ourselves, our story and our view of God. We renewed our vision about the kind of difference we wanted to make in our lifetime. But we started with some honest talk about the ‘real’ of life.
As a life coach and former pastor’s wife, I’ve talked with a lot of women over the years. There have been two reoccurring themes that continue to come out in those conversations.
- I want to make a difference with my life.
- I’m stuck.
Does that sound familiar to your story? You want to make a difference. You want to influence your world for good through your life in your lifetime.
But you are stuck! Or you have been! If you aren’t stuck, or haven’t been, you will be so we might as well talk about it. You know what stuck feels like. Stuck has kept you from making the difference you long to make. So before we talk about the kind of difference we want to make let’s talk about the obstacles to it. Continue reading Coaching on Stuck
Today I’m sitting in a booth at Panera people watching mostly. I had visions of writing- a blog, a chapter, even an email, but I’m just not into it. I’m tired! Discouraged! Weary! Yet I’m not!
Do you ever have those days? When you feel like you can’t do the next thing even though you are excited about it. You even like what you are doing!
A college team of girls and their coaches came in for dinner. I didn’t ask if it was volley ball or basketball, but immediately the space around me was filled with conversation.
As I sat watching I reflected back on my own journey.
When you are young, you don’t think about life ending. You are young! You expect to have all of life ahead of you! You live and dream and plan as if there is nothing stopping you.
When you are in your 20’s, you get a job or marriage that keeps you focused. The job wasn’t what you thought it would be- but hey, it’s a job. You marriage isn’t the fairy tale you dreamed it would be, but hey you are in love. You still have the energy and the stamina to tackle anything in your way, so you keep on with determination.
You hit your 30’s and 40’s and suddenly thing gets harder. You get the promotion you thought you wanted and the family you always dreamed of. Now you have trouble remembering what your dream is because somewhere, someone else is telling you what to do. Your boss, the needs of your kids, the bills that must be paid. You can’t imagine what it would look like to stop what you are doing- if you drop one ball the whole thing will be crashing in on you. So you keep going!
You turn 50! You either lost your passion for The job you had or you got laid off. Now you are starting over again. The kids are going to or finishing college, you are prompted to remember the dreams you had when you were their age. You long for that ability to face the future with such vibrancy and freedom.
i’m not sure about the next 60’s on up. I’m not there…yet!
But what happens if at any point along the way- life would end unexpectedly. What if you die? at 94, or 68, or 27, 15 or maybe 8? Continue reading Life’s Too Short!
This is the 4th and final post in the series Living Open Handed in a White Knuckle World. If you have missed the previous posts, it would be helpful to go back and read them in order to understand how we got to this post. Links are provided below.
Through these posts,
- we have identified our fears that cause us to create fist
- then opened the little finger to admit or acknowledge we have a need.
- Next we lifted the ring finger and wrote a psalm including those fears and needs.
Now we are ready to open the middle finger which stands for P: PIVOT. Continue reading Living Open Handed: Pivot to See God
This is the third in a series on LIVING OPEN HANDED. If you missed them, it might be helpful to go back so you understand how we got to this post.
1. LIVING OPEN HANDED: Do Not Fear
This is the second post in the Living Open Handed series.
Let’s consider what it takes to LIVE with OPEN HANDS, in a white knuckle world.
I ask you make a fist again- because generally that is what our hand looks like when we are afraid. Now, consider your knuckles as a tool to help you remember how to OPEN your hands.
But we are going to work backwards.
First, Open your little finger and recall the N stands for:
I HAVE NEED——
When we experience fear, we become aware that we are in need. We don’t often admit it, but we usually NEED God to show up in a big way. However, too often we don’t go to God first. Instead we have to recognize that a fear appears most often because a NEED we have is being compromised.
If you consider Maslov’s Hierarchy of Needs that I studied in my classes for coaching, maybe you can identify what need is trampled in some way.
But another way to come to terms with your needs is to read the Psalms.
How many times as you read through the Psalms do you find a Psalmist that is voicing your hearts cry.
In regard to your fears (refer to your list you made yesterday), what are the needs that are not being met? Write them down next to the fear. Be as descriptive as you can be. It will help with the next step in tomorrow’s post.
Missed the first post, click here!
Want to read the next one- here it is!